An invocation for my stay in the home home here I alight upon my knees on soft and unsullied soil beseech the currents to convey me to a space of peace and shelter from carrying the weight of the world just for a while home hold me for that while in your shell, freshly hatched seize the worlds cold breath to keep me present in variations of being alive I invoke my path guided by my footsteps the grid of rituals that keeps me carefully aligned amidst the decay of my time so as dawn yawns and awakens, I descend into my body and nourish myself with the fire, I let my mind be guided towards the thrill of only the moment, I grind coffee beans and water my cells, I sketch the outline of the day at hand, I speck myself into an endarkened dream, I sink into my legs and run, run, run, I find the kitchen with flavors, fibres and scents, I cherish a shower and good food at noon, I weave strings of signs and spills and symbols, I tend to tasks craving hands, I plunge into liberation from the corners of my mind, I visit the spaces of power, I consolidate reality through my tongue and my greed, I behold the musings of my hand trailing, trailing, trailing the word of you, I float into midnight, I systematically drift off at a stone, I keep myself carefully set in the grid guided by my footsteps I invoke my path I pray for the sensuous to surpass my tangible sensitivity the floor above the ceiling; a manually operated vacuum cleaner in my mouth, sucking up waste electricity of your nervous system eternally grating in a soundless quivering rhythm that will nurture my unsettled, uncertain, unnecessary, unportrayed wilderness home how will you aspire to my searching hands? I summon the word which is not mine, but yours that it will drift out from its hiding places in the cracks of your walls to splash around in my inner ocean indifferent as it drops from my hand resounding emptiness, forbidden, superficial, overly romantic, bewildered, minuscule, battered and damned, befucked a deep sea nettle towards the surface for light unsuitable for living, loving but breathing transformed into a mirror ball then into a dewdrop on a doorknob of your front door a dripping faucet, an old radio crackling, unspeakable, unsaid my mother humming from somewhere nearby, unheard obtained by the soundscape stretching time back into clotty letters and blistering bits unaligned, disrupted all because I strive to see you as you are read you as you are nothing less nothing more than the word you let me hold I summon my primary, invoke my authenticity oppose spurious temptations without struggle clasp onto my delicate flame insisting on its connectedness, my heart I stand firm in my sincerity, my inherence alone, with ancient souls by my side home I invoke purpose I pray for walking backwards I pray for your trust in me /boom
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